Turkey Becomes Thanksgiving Lawyer, Sues Everyone

“I object!” he gobbled loud,
Wearing tie and feathers proud.
Ma dropped pie, Pa dropped the knife,
Lou yelled, “He’s suing for his life!”
Granny gasped, “That bird’s got grit,”
While preacher cried, “This trial’s legit!”
He sued the town for gravy hate,
Then cross-examined stuffing fate.
He filed briefs ‘gainst pumpkin lies,
And grilled Ma hard with cranberry eyes.
His closing speech made children weep,
As chickens nodded, “Preach it, peep!”
He won the case, got pardons fast,
Then sued the dog for snacking past.
Now turkeys march in legal flair,
Thanksgiving canceled–file with care.

Alan Nafzger (editor@bohiney.com)

Last Updated on October 18, 2022 by Alan Nafzger

By Alan Nafzger

Professor Alan Nafzger is the publisher of Farm.FM, writing from Wichita Falls, Texas. He earned his Ph.D. in political science with a focus on rural policy and agricultural economics, a master's degree in public administration emphasizing rural development, and a bachelor's degree in political science. Over a dual career spanning 57 years, he has taught rural policy, agricultural economics, and county administration while managing a family operation that includes farming, ranching, and dairy. The classroom and the farmstead keep each other honest: he writes about the policies he has studied and the cattle, crops, and milk checks he has actually had to live with.

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