Pig Launches Fitness Brand, Sells Trough-to-Table Meal Plans and High-Intensity Mud Workouts

Ma joined class in rubber boots,
Pa brought dumbbells made of roots.
Pig wore tights and snorted loud,
“Let’s shred this slop, now move that snout!”
He burpeed through the compost bin,
Did squats in muck with gleeful grin.
“Fitness ain’t clean–it’s gritty sweat,
We burn the bacon, not regret!”
Goat did pushups on a pail,
Granny deadlifted with a bale.
Rooster tried but passed out cold,
Preacher wept and cried, “Be bold!”
City trainers paid him rent,
To license “Oink Fit” with 40%.
Meal plans came with slop deluxe,
And protein shakes in mason jugs.
Now mud is chic and troughs are glam,
All thanks to Pig, the farm’s new ham.

Alan Nafzger (editor@bohiney.com)

Last Updated on March 21, 2021 by Alan Nafzger