Extreme Couponing

Ma’s got binders thicker than beef,
With coupons stacked like barnyard grief.
She bought twelve hams for the price of soap,
Then bartered ’em off to the county pope.
We once left the store with carts of cheese,
Cost us a nickel and the manager’s keys.
She clipped for hours by candlelight,
Then traded Bibles for beans last night.
At church she once tithed in frozen peas,
Claimed “the Lord loves savings on groceries.”
She haggled so hard at the Dollar Tree,
The cashier cried and just gave it for free.
She stacked five coupons on chicken feed,
Now we own stock in a poultry creed.
She once got kicked from a Walgreens aisle,
For using a rebate on birth control and tile.
Even the preacher asked for tips,
After she saved forty bucks on apocalypse chips.
We ain’t rich, but we sure ain’t broke,
Thanks to Ma and her scissors folk.

Alan Nafzger (editor@bohiney.com)

Last Updated on May 16, 2026 by Alan Nafzger