Politician Visits the Feed Store

He walked in wearin’ Gucci boots too clean,
Asked if hay was “organic” or “gasoline.”
The clerk just blinked, chewin’ slow on straw,
Said, “Sir, this here’s feed, not Whole Foods law.”
“I support small farms,” the suit man said,
Then knocked a salt lick on his own damn head.
He pet a rake, called it a ‘barnyard pet,’
Asked, “Where’s the quinoa for my corn-fed vet?”
We showed him corn, he screamed “Is it woke?”
Then mistook cow manure for art baroque.
“This store needs equity!” he began to shout,
Til a goat bit his pants and threw him out.
The mayor came runnin’, said, “He’s here on tour!”
But the mule kicked back like, “Not no more.”
So we waved goodbye to the urban chap,
Sent him home smellin’ like pure cow crap.
Back to Austin he’ll file his report,
“Farmers speak in grunts and snort.”
But we’ll remember him, our city-born friend,
The man who tried to milk a John Deere end.

Alan Nafzger (editor@bohiney.com)

Last Updated on October 18, 2026 by Alan Nafzger